Adventures of a Dog Owner

I can't count how many times in my life I've had to eat my own words. Most recently, the words I had to eat were "Honey, I want a big dog." Now, mind you these are words I uttered almost two years ago and they're just now coming back to bite me on the ass.

Hubby and I decided over the weekend that our dogs (Liberty 62 pounds and Justice 55 pounds) were stinky and needed a bath. Instead of bathing them ourselves, we rather lazily decided to take them to PetSmart to the grooming salon and have them bathed there where they would brush their teeth, clean their ears, trim their nails and all kinds of other things that we would never do if we bathed them at home. We also decided since the weather is getting warmer that Liberty, since she is long haired, needed to be trimmed up some so she won't get so hot. All sounds like a great plan right? It is a great plan until you get to the actual execution of the plan.

I get home from work Monday at 4:30. Their appointment is at 6:00. So I come in and get all of the CRAP off of the top of one of their crates and haul it to the Jeep. Ben and I had discussed the night before that I would take them and he would pick them up on his way home from work. We had also decided that we would put them together in one crate since they wouldn't be in there very long. This was the first of many miscalculations in this little adventure.

So, I go in the house and relax for a little while and at about 5:15 I decide I had better start getting these two loaded up. I bring them in the house, put their leashes on them, at which point they go nuts. They LOVE getting to leave the house and they were very excited. Usually there is two of us to handle two excited dogs but, not this time, just me. I manage to get them out the door and get the back of the jeep and the crate open. First I try to get Justice in since he usually jumps right up into the crate. No, not this time. He gets his front paws up there and then won't go any further. I have to keep control of Libby and lift his butt up in the crate. Mission one, accomplished. Then I have to get Libby in. She is usually more reluctant than Justice to just jump right up because she's rather clumsy. But usually she'll at least put her front paws up for me. Nope, not this time. She laid down on the ground and refused to get in. I had to pick up all 62 pounds of her and shove her into the crate. Needless to say at this point in time I'm a little hot, a little sweaty and a LOT aggravated.

Finally the three of us are on the road. And of course, I get into town, and traffic is a royal pain. The worst part of it all is that for the majority of the time I was sitting stuck in traffic, my destination was in sight. Very frustrating. So, my two lovelies are shoved in this one crate together for much longer than anticipated. Liberty begins to get aggravated from Justice being on her and she starts growling at him. I'm thinking "GREAT! I've got one dog about to kill the other and no way to get out of traffic and get them off of each other." So, I do the only thing I can think of. I yell at her to "CUT IT OUT!" Thank the lord that did the trick. Everyone was quiet for the rest of the trip.

When we arrive in the PetSmart parking lot I am completely relieved to see that there is a parking space right up front. I get out and proceed to try to unload two anxious, excited dogs. My strategy is to barely open the door to the crate and grab both of their leashes before I let them out. No such luck. As soon as I open the door Justice comes flying out and right into the road. I was able to grab Liberty's collar before she went anywhere and thank goodness Justice came back to me when I called him.

Now we begin our walk to the grooming salon. While still in the parking lot, Justice keeps going from one side of me to the other wrapping me up in the leash. I finally get them both to the doors of the store and the automatic opening doors freak them out. By this point in time, I no longer wanted to deal with them so I DRAGGED them into the store. Of course, there are other dogs in the store and they want to go visit. Justice gets the leash wrapped around me again and starts pulling for all he's worth and Liberty is too. I look like a complete idiot in the middle of this store being dragged and almost knocked down. People are all around me telling me what cute dogs they are. I had many words to describe them at that moment. "Cute" was not on my list.

I was finally able to get unwrapped from them and get them into the grooming salon. A girl came right up and said it looked like I had my hands full and took Liberty from me. Finally, one dog, this I can handle. The girl had been gone for no more than 5 seconds when someone behind me starts petting Justice. I look around to see who it is, yeah, it's my husband. He wasn't supposed to be there until much later but at that moment, all I could think was, couldn't you have gotten here just a few minutes sooner? I was, none the less, grateful to see him. Instead of going home, I stayed with him and he took me to dinner and we hit a few stores before they called us to come and get them. We decided on the trip home, it would be best to take them in separate cars. The trip home was a much more pleasant experience.

Needless to say, in the future, I have decided two things. One, they can have a bath at home. Two, if they are going out in public, two dogs = two people.